Wedding Day Jokester Gifts

"I now pronounce you guilty."

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

'He does.'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

'Despite his laser eye surgery, he still doesn't see the mess he leaves in the living room every day.'

"First, I'll read the minutes from your last weddings."

Bride is angry, as she notices that the groom figure on the cake is drunk.

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

"I'm sorry Jayne, but I've got cold feet."

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

The Aisle

"If either of you know any cause or impediment why you should not be married, INCLUDING YouTube CLIPS, declare it now."

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

Australian wedding, sheep gesturing, 'If there's anybody here who knows why these two should not be wed...'

"Congratulations, dude, and you may now play tonsil hockey with the bride."

"You may now kiss the bride."

"Horace, what are we doing on the same cloud? Our vows said 'till death do us part.'"

"And do you, Bob, promise to treat Karen as well as you treat your vintage 1950 Indian Blackhawk motorcycle?"

'My best friend threw her bouquet to me at her wedding, and I ATE it!'

'Swear on your unpublished novels that you will support each other's ridiculous dreams.'

For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health for a full 13 episodes...?

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'