Water Connoisseur Gifts

The wine and water lists.

'Hang on! Is it triple filtered?'

'I'll have the pure water.'

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

Holiday-maker taking hotel's entire drinking water supply, "All inclusive, then!"

"Would sir care to see the water list?"

"This is the old water tower back when this was a small town. This is how everyone got their water."

Raw Water Trend

Montezumz's revenge: bottled water from Mexico.

'I waste money? You're the one who signed up for a $500 water-tasting class.'

'Do you have artisanal water?'

'Don't even think about it. Your food bill is high enough.'

The Game Man: And is interested only in water as clear as gin - and twice as expensive.

Mineral Water: Still or Sparkling

Do you want original spring water or new and improved spring water?

'If I'm not mistaken, Mayfield is a sewage treatment plant.'

Advertising Agency - Miss Perks, I got the bottled water account.

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

'A cheeky red?'

'No ice.'

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Bring your own inflatable.

Bacchus.

Join me in a Martini?

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'You certainly have a well equipped workbench.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

'Man...You age great!'

"I make it myself!"

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"