Watching Mystery Series Gifts

'She's dead alright. The question is: did she jump, or was she pushed?'

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

Binge Watch

Starvation Watching

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

"Okay so which one stole your cereal?"

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

'Madge! Desperate Housewives is on.'

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Back in 2 to 5 years.

Mobster Dogs Burying Bones

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

'I'm just saying... Maybe we're over doing the old 'good cop, bad cop' routine.'

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

"It's really a long cave...prepare to binge watch."

Daredevil. No. But it's been months now. I wanna talk about it. Well, I haven't watched the last couple episodes yet. Blasphemy! You have one job as a modern American consumer of Netflixian entertainment: and that's to binge-watch every episode the day the series is released. Sorry, little buddy. Some of us have lives. What's that supposed to mean?! Careful what you say around seniors. You'd never be man enough to handle a good Price is Right marathon! You distract it while I make my escape.

"I'm sorry Muggzy, but I'm taking the deal and turning state's witness."

Alan Davies.

'With all those presents Santa carries, do you think he packs heat? . . . And maybe he's not really fat, but he's wearing a kevlar vest.'

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

'I'm in for identity theft, I stole it off someone who was wanted for murder.'

'This will help you keep track of who's who.'

'Don't give up Albert - one of these cans has to have tuna in it!'

"We've picked up a tail."

Richard gets the third degree.

Crime Stoppers Stopper / Cash to keep yer trap shut

"The mortgage payments on our new hideout should be somewhat alleviated by our upcoming schedule of bank robberies."

You're on the "Ask Sadie" show. What's your problem?! I just found out "Empire" and "Star" are in the same universe. For months I've been telling everyone I knew that "Star" was a blatant ripoff of "Empire." But then I found out they're made by the same people and they're in the same tv universe, and I'm like totally fine with it now. Stop it! We speak "English" on this show, not "tv addict"! Wait a minute ... are we talking about soap operas? Because there's an exception for soap operas. No, we

'Oh, how moving, it's a woodland burial, Dennis.'

"Hey, let's mix it up a bit today and have you be the bad cop."

"You're not leaving until we know everything."