Watching Matches Gifts

'Bugger! My brain's just pulled a hammy.'

"You know, if it wasn't for the players, we'd have a good team."

'We're in a hurry.'

Masochistic Soccer Fan

Ghana 1 - Germany 0

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

A boxing referee with a black eye

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

Pete Sampras

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

Putting Practice.

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

'John is watching the game under protest.'

'And now on the comedy channel Jose Mourinho's latest outburst.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'Hey, hey, hey!'

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

'All this viewing is an endurance event in itself...'