Warrior Queen Fan T-Shirts

"Warrior queen or not, she shouldn't be driving that thing on a school run."

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

"Do you think the world really is going to hell, or are we just getting old?"

"I'm a working mom."

"The Equal Opportunity people say I can't call you my sidekick any more. You're now my personal assistant."

'You're too aggressive.'

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'Actually, I find the destroying more satisfying than the nation-building.'

"The doctor will see you in a week - if you could still be ill a week on Wednesday."

Cleopatra

"I found a portal to another world. I found peril and adventure, and the courage to survive. But, no, I didn't find the remote."

'You're too aggressive.'

Linda Carter played Wonder Woman on the odl TV show. Her dad was Irish-American and her mom was Mexican-American. Before that, she was Miss World USA. Before that, she was forced by her abuelita to eat beauty and muscle foods like rice and beans."

'Razed any good cities lately?'

Freddie Mercury

"Hopefully I'll have enough frequent pillaging points after this trip to get a new sword!"

Condoleezza Rice

"Shoo!"

'Now that's what I CALL a free-range chicken'

The 24/7 Samurai

"And the endorsement deals I get for kid's merchandise is cra-azy!"

'You'll have to excuse her - being on hold with Disneyland Paris has sent her goofy...'

10 items or less queue. (Woman has thrown eggs onto floor).

Unicorn with a drooping horn.

Dr. Godot's waiting room.

Why do medical test results always come back on a Monday so we have to wait through the whole weekend to get our life-and-death results? You've signed a mouthful.

"What took so long? I wanted to be thorough, so instead of singing Happy Birthday while washing my hands, I sang Bohemian Rhapsody."

'Your hands-off approach isn't working.'

'Hello, my name is Bill and I've been - aaaargh! I did it again!'

Outbreak of Boer War

Genghis Khan

Ancient Greek Downsizing