Waiting In Lines Gifts

Impatient queue of people. The signs read queue here,sigh heavily from here, and Tut Loudly from here.

Bored men in waiting room

Sorry out of numbers.

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'A cheeky red?'

Diner.

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

'Your French dip, sir.'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

"Even the waiters here are organic."

'You complimented the chef on his dumplings -now he wishes to return the compliments!'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'No ice.'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'