Wage Worrier Gifts

"My take home pay must have gone to someone else's house."

"I'm at that sweet spot in my career...right between 'young and underpaid' and 'old and too expensive.'"

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

'Being a nobody isn't so bad...You don't have to worry about becoming a has-been.'

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

I think I have a gilt complex.

"I hate my job and I'm terrified of losing it."

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'Aunt Joan and Uncle Wally took Luci to the emergency room.'

The Circle.

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

"It's just until the air conditioning in our house is fixed."

Energy Bills

"You know it almost BEGGARS belief that so many people are unwilling to pay for professional pension advice."

"You forgot to read the small print Mr Burrows. My charges are ten pounds a letter and you have two hundred and thirty three on this page."

"No, there's nothing wrong at my job. That's what's got me worried."

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

'Of course things change: our fathers were replaced by machines - we'll be replaced with new software.'

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'It's money in the bank. . . so it's worrisome.'

"Sidney gets nervous if he's too far from his money."

Eye of needle fat cat size That'll do nicely.

"Do you have money or is it money that has you?"

Credit Crunch.

"I thought I'd done everything to get a decent pension..."

"My arthritis lets me know when it's going to rain, and my acid reflux lets me know when a stock market storm is rolling in."

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'

"Oh, great, the warranty is up."

"Right. Money isn't everything - what's the other thing again?"