Wacky Cook Gifts

Brain Pasta

'I think I'll go home and eat'

Before getting a basketball scholarship, Jack worked at a pancake house.

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Witch's Brew.

Baloneystini

All-Candy Seder.

"More helium."

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

Picasso

Breakfast surreal.

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

"You think you're so damn Cordon Bleu!"

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

The Criminally Insane Gourmet.

'Ralph, I'm gonna' need wings on the fly!'

Cook and Octopus

"That's a toaster. It's a tanning bed for bread."

'Guys, I think this is one of those 'let it go' moments in life when you have to relax and just trust the processor!'

A chef uses a giant utensil to chop a tiny sausage.

'Well, duh, here's my problem...instead of non-stick spray, I bought Nun Stick Spray.'

Under strict laboratory conditions extensive research proves that, despite being watched, pots do eventually boil.

"And he's a nutritional-support animal, too."

'It's her signature dish.'

"I don't want the burger on a trendy wooden platter, the egg on Welsh slate or, my fries in a terracotta pot - I want soup served in a sock!"

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.