Vow Skeptic Gifts

I do if she does. I do if he does. I have a bad feeling about this.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

"I do love you, Jerry, but it's somewhere below the conscious level."

10 Commandments in the Supreme Court (USA)

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

Cupid misses his shot.

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"...for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death or litigation do you part?"

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

"You may now kiss the bride."

Yes, but.

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"For richer or poorer, in function and dysfunction,..."

"I tolerate you too. With all my heart."

Vote Grinkley! Now you see him, now you don't.

"If only I liked you a little more and you liked like me a little less."

"Oh, you were on automatic pilot? And what about her? Was she on automatic pilot, too?"

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

"It's from a girl in my class. Should I be thinking about a prenup?"

'No wonder the divorce rate is so high!'

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'Do you promise to love, honor, and kiss the bed covers goodbye?'

Second Thoughts Wedding

Doing Something About the Weather

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

"I wish your temperature told the real truth about you."

Alternative Accountants

Elderly spinster commenting on a marriage

"For better for worse. For richer for poorer. I sickness and in health....I warned you these vows were extremely graphic."

'I refuse to say 'Cross my heart and hope to die'.'