Vow Renewers Gifts

Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?

"Will you listen to the same three anecdotes until one of you dies?"

"I love that you still call me 'honey'."

"I remember that game of Spin-the-Bottle like it was yesterday. It was love at firstspin."

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

'Being in love with you makes me feel young again, Doris. Will you wait while I go play on the swings?'

"I now pronounce you man and wife - do you wish to save these changes?"

Wedding selfie stick

"...for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death or litigation do you part?"

"You may now kiss the bride."

"You said it—everybody heard you."

Old Love

"Randy the love doctor, what ails you, brother?" "My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony." "But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike?" "Of course." "That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all." "Exactly. ...Wait, what do you mean by that?"

"Will you still love me when I'm old and past it?"

"For richer or poorer, in function and dysfunction,..."

'Are you kidding? Of course I take this woman - wouldn't you???'

"As long as we're renewing our vows anyway, I've come up with a few new ones."

"If I could choose any age I'd be forty-two again. You were hot when I was forty-two."

'Do you promise to love, honor, and kiss the bed covers goodbye?'

Woman: 'I, Linda...will ALWAYS, A,E,I,O,U.' / Man:'And I, Shaun...will ALWAYS, A,E,I,O,U.'

'Tell me, Sadie -just how many times is it now that we have been gathered here today?'

"When we have fun, we really have fun."

Marriage counsellor with 'Better' and 'Worse' desk trays.

For our 25th anniversary, I think we should renew our vow not to kill each other.

'And do you, Sarah, promise never to Google his ex-wife?'

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"For better for worse. For richer for poorer. I sickness and in health....I warned you these vows were extremely graphic."

"We can't scrub the 'forsaking all others' bit."

'I refuse to say 'Cross my heart and hope to die'.'

"Are you, Michael on the same page as Melissa?"

"My parents must have forgotten what they learned in school. I heard them talking about renewing their vowels."

"I'm just pricing this second honeymoon you've been on about. . . were you thinking of tagging along?"

Ask Sadie. Sadie, how do you keep the romance alive in a senior relationship? Signed, Randy. *Actual reader question. I'd like to bring in my correspondent to handle this one. Oh, do I have to, Snookums? I don't know what to say to these people. I think I'm going to take a pass. DO IT OR NO NOOKIE FOR YOU UNTIL 2029. Communication and compromise.

Of course my love is unconditional! We put it in the pre-nup, remember?

'And do you Kevin, take, no arm twisting, please.'