Volatility Watcher Gifts

'In today's action, the Dow Jones Industrial Average cratered, then soared, then swooned, then skyrocketed, then plummeted, then rebounded, and finally threw up.'

The day the stock market went UP.

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

Great Chinese Dynasties

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

Annual profits,

'You know the economy's in trouble when the Forbes 400 list of wealthiest Americans only has 350 names on it.'

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

World Economic Crisis.

Economy - USA.

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

"It's called American acceptionalism. We grab more and more of the country's wealth and 99% of Americans just continue to accept it."

'Remember, an economic boom is usually followed by an economic kaboom,'

'The Truth-in-advertising people want us to call ourselves the 'Sluggish Fund Group'.'

Jumping Wall Street.

'The good news is we've finally turned the corner. The bad news is, no government bailout.'

"What's wrong, boy? Has Google's stock gone down?!"

"I never dreamed I'd ever enjoy watching my figure this much."

"Okay... how about some people are poverty rich but asset poor?"

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

The symbol for the euro (?) depicted as the wheel of a wheelchair, symbolising the state of the currency

'Just to let you know the cause of your pain and my advice is Quite Watching Stock Prices Go Up And Down.'

Money god

'If we're going to be the sponsor of a winter Olympic even, it should be the downhill.'

News and Magazines. Tax Bill Debate. The trickle-down can never compete with siphon-up.

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

"Presidential approval ratings. US stock market confidence indices. U.S. dollar index. So much winning."