Voice Therapist Gifts

'Looks like laryngitis. Want to tell me about it?'

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

Dialogue

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

Liam Gallagher.

Songbird.

"A haand gel...!?"

'I have a limited vocabulary because I'm a child, what's your excuse?'

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...

"Liife! Give my conversation Liife!"

"Siri meets Alexa" "What can I help you with?" "I'm sorry, I can't answer that."

Dyslexic Cattle Ranch

Volcaniax

Irritable Vowel Syndrome: "EEEIIIOOOAAA AUUUEEE!!"

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

"I can't talk louder, I'm a little horse."

What's the big surprise? All the latest theories of linguistics say we're born with the innate capacity for generating sentences.

"These meetings were a lot shorter before we invented compound sentences."

Monosyllabic Crisis Center

"OK, now you can sing your heart out."

Tenors

It's nothing to worry about - many kids his age have trouble with the letter S.

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

"I've never, ever taken you for granted, Ingrid."