Voice Messaging Gifts

I don't believe this...I just fell in love with a recording!

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"My email is down... talk to me."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Polly txt speak

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Campaign for Plain English

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"This report is mumbo jumbo...I asked for gobbledeeegook!"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

ZOOM 'n' GLOOM.

"National security adviser"

Inclusive speech

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"You're such a good listener."

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"