Messaging Gifts

'...Send again doesn't look like they got it.'

"If they just added texting to how they calculate GDP, this economy would be growing by 20%."

Text Mingling.

Can Megan come out and text?

'I hate it when I have to talk on my phone.'

The early version of accidentally hitting 'reply all.'

"We'll always have WhatsApp."

"I like parenting my cellphone...there's a lot less yelling."

"That tweet you sent me was so short, it was barely a peep."

"What's wrong with sexting? It's not like anyone gets hurt."

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

'The patient is out of his mind, but you can leave a message.'

'Sure, you write me, but you never instant-message me.'

The end is near - well, at least for the sandwich board guy.

Turn on chat. Delete conversation.

"Death by 1,000 Texts"

'Nah, just send it Federal Express.'

"You must have misunderstood me...I only agreed to pre-marital 'text'."

Phones PDA IM Text. Ernie's always been all thumbs --- He's a natural at text messaging!

Generation-I. Generation-V. What're you old folks doing? Renaming your generation. I'm thinking Generation I - 'cause you're living virtual lives. Where'd he go? Got bored after 10 seconds and left to send an instant message to someone across the room.

I met a girl last night. It went well. Do tell. We saw each other through a crowd. I winked at her. She winked back. If all goes well, we may get to second base tonight. Second base? We may exchange smiley emoticons instead of just hitting "wink." Are you sure you're ready for that?

"You probably don't need to write 'sorry for the delayed reply' every time, Natasha."

"Textin’"

Girl texting crush thinking "He loves me...he loves me not."

"So, we're texting lesbian erotica to each other for months, and then I find out 'she' is a Republican congressman from Ohio."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"My email is down... talk to me."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."