Visiting Casinos Gifts

'I'm not sure, but I think illegal gambling is when you win.'

Monkey casino study.

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

'How about a game of cards?'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'I don't like to take chances.'

Dog in casino.

Wild Weather Ride - 2005.

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

Slug roulette

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'

'It's a penny slot--give me a hundred.'

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

'This could be me and you, your honor. Heading for Las Vegas!'

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

'Once again, I fold.'

'My wife encourages this. She thinks I'm playing the Russian version.'

'Why do you always win at cards but not horses? I can't shuffle the horses.'

Destination casinos...

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

'I need to find a loose machine like that.'

Tonto Casino.

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'

"They said whatever you left in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas."

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

'Our ceiling is under repair--sorry.'

Visit Las Vegas! The city that never sleeps' ot even takes a nap!: 'Because of competition, they had to raise the ante!'

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

'This is the third one today. Why can't the gynecologists have their convention someplace other than Vegas?'

"I think I need a professional money manager. I invest sixty five percent of my money gambling in casinos and thirty five percent I keep under the mattress."