Vision Awareness Gifts

'Long time, no see!'

National Everything Awareness Day

Florida Governor, Rick Scott, cuts funding for rape victims.

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

Can't even hold signs well.

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

Large print e-book.

Say balls to testicular cancer, remember to check your crown jewels regularly.

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

Hospital Departments

'Have you tried removing the blindfold?'

'When are you going to admit you need glasses?'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

NHS/Private Eye Care.

'It's Blurred.'

Musical Eye Test

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

'They suit you.'

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

Pollution Look

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'I'm getting a head start for Movember.'

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

"Do you have a cure doctor?"

I think I need new glasses. I swear I just saw a tiny man jump off your bridge.

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

"Your main problem is that instead of a set of complex organs composed of specialized sensory cells and sophisticated nerve structures, you've got two pieces of coal."

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

'Nicely done. You may have double-vision, but it's 20-20, 20-20.'

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

Warning Being Alive On This Planet May Cause Cancer