Vintage Tech Nerd Gifts

The early days of e-mailing.

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

'Oh, relax - you're doing great for your age...but I am a little concerned about out computer's old operating system.'

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

Drive in movies.

Early on-line shopping

"It's very sweet of you to visit him. Mr. Mainframe doen't get out much since the desktops came in."

We have a nice selection of office artifacts, a typewriter, carbon paper, ashtrays, our CEO's last handwritten memo...

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Old Phones Lasagne

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

"I know we said we'd get you a laptop,but this will have to do until business improves."

'Trevor was the first rep at the office to have a portable computer.'

"Go ahead and laugh, but this baby hasn't crashed since 1961."

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

'We've got to upgrade our computer system. Downloading information on this one takes too long.'

Old and new technologies

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

'I call it 'Myspace'''

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

'When I was told our new computer was going to be state of the art, no one mentioned it was state of the art in 1954.'

'Peter Rabbit and his sisters, Floppy Disc and Mopsy.'

The Final Chapter.

"Goodnight Tommy, sleeptight, watch the millenium bugs don't bite."

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'