Vintage Speech Lover Gifts

Mr Micawber Delivers some Valedictory Remarks

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Cocktails on the verandah.

Inclusive speech

The Missing Sock Returns

What's normal?

Military Medals

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

Early Piety

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

Changing Minds

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

MLK

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

"Before texting we had to write letters by hand, and before emojis we honestly just bottled up our emotions."

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

'I know I complimented you on that outfit last time you wore it, but that was in 1980.'

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

Opening the Barrel

'The village's oldest inhabitant? We did have one, but he died.'