Vintage Book Collector Gifts

'This isn't so bad..I used to go door to selling Encyclopaedias.'

D. H. Lawrence

"That's the third time today the copier's broken down!"

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Rare Books

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Characters jumping out of a book.

Great British Eccentrics.

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

Early Colour TV

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

The original paperless office

Do it yourself books.

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Sue the Author 3PM