Vine Swingers Gifts

"We were wondering if you could take the bodywork seminar elsewhere."

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Tarzan of the Grapes.

I think you're ace

'Hole in one!!!!'

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

"No more swinging from tree to tree! Now I take the bus and I even get a senior discount!"

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

The Amateur Golfer

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

'Where's my horse?'

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

"I don't want our date to end, either, but my arm is about to fall off."

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

Thursday is the new Friday

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

"I'll race you to the top."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

Swinging through the jungle.

'Can I get a Chardonnay over dry ice? I hate it when my wine gets wet.'

Golf Hil Divot

Eden. There's great leaves to wear growing on this vine. Ah, it's the new summer clothing line!

'That takes you into double figures and we're not off the tee yet!'

'You're away, Doc!'

Cricket Lovers

'First time I've seen the club go farther than the ball.'

"I've had a rough day. Give me a whole ball of twine straight up."

'My name is John and I'm a golfaholic!'

"I hate sand traps."

"Nice putt."

'I think we'd better work on that swing.'

Rory McIlroy