Video Sleuth Gifts

"We didn't realize the CCTV footage was doctored until our precinct fanboy found a continuity mistake."

"After viewing the video footage, it wasn't the dog making the mess, after all..."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

$1: Family Secrets

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

Clickbait

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

The lunar landing of Appollo 11 is shown as a hoax filmed in a studio.

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

The Modern Godot

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

I'd rather be phishing.

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

Don't look know, but I think you're being Googled.

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

"I've already go t a diagnosis from homedoc.com..."

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

'...if he only knew what I wrote about him on my blog.'

Two men converse secretively

What security flaw?

"If you look at Lexington Avenue, it is anyone's guess what's happening on the 6 train. Moving on to Broadway, I can tell you that the N and R Lines may or may not be running smoothly, while the Eighth Avenue A and C are, as always, a complete mystery."

I'm loving the phone hacking scandal. I love it when ne'er-do-wells use technology to steal personal information. Because you like when people suffer. No. Because I love it when technology is proven as evil. Spare me. Technology is not evil. People are evil. Computers don't hack people. People hack people. Macs hack, Macs hack! You watch your mouth, filthy human! Fight, fight …

Able to Google Stuff Man

"We've gleaned all we need to know about you from the internet, but we'll keep your resume as a great example of creative writing."

'And what if I did doctor the documents? I'm a doctor.'

'Nice try buddy, but we know the score. You were involved, but you only played a small part. What we want to know is who orchestrated this thing.'

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

"I'm all for security, but you having an 80-factor authentication may be a little over the top."