Video Production Gifts

'It's not your traditional report. I've done it in the form of a YouTube video.'

"Will you be posting this on ewe tube?"

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

"We desperately need a new video presentation."

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

'Before each of you is a video camera. In the event I do something that could go viral...'

"Hello and welcome to this YouTube video on distance learning."

"It's my extreme sports camera. I thought it would be cool to show my mom what I do at work."

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

Obama's new campaign video

'This thing is airproof, right?'

'Okay boys, the single is terrible but if we can make a nasty video for it that gets banned, we got us a No1'

'Excuse me, would you like some tips on video marketing?'

'It's my new hobby. Do something interesting. This is streaming live on the internet.'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Herman Mankiewicz

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

Canadian film production

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."