Video Game Philosopher Pillows

"I'm not just playing video games--I'm contributing to the zeitgeist of the times."

"What would happen if you put down your weapon and tried to work things out peacefully?"

"My mom will only let me play Angry Birds if they're passive aggressive."

"Saying you're moral because you believe in God is like saying you're a soldier because you play 'Call of Duty'."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

"I hope I get rock and you get scissors, or I get scissors and you get paper, or I get paper and you get rock."

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

Davos.

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

Solitaire card shark.

'When the music stops, sit down in the nearest chair. Whoever doesn't get a chair is redundant.'

'Maybe it's me, but I have a feeling we're being used as pawns.'

'Then it's agreed - we all keep our arms raised until someone blinks.'

Football Thinker

No Strike Zone Man.

'Rock beats scissors, sanctions it is!'

Peel as the Knave of Spades

'This is not what we meant, Snider, when we asked for a thorough study of the laws of gravity.'

"Eh? What? Eh? I'm sorry, I dozed off during all that cross-field and back passing."

"What if we could see five dimensions?"

Chess boxing

What violent video game? We're watching the news.

Footballer plays in labyrinth.

'Although we've vanquished the invaders from Paperland, we really should have allied with them for the impending attack on us by Rockland!'

'It stands for, 'Rock, Paper, Scissors'.'

If chess allowed gerrymandering.

The referee...

"What kind of idiot gets suckered into something like that?"

"I call it, 'wheel'. I spin it, drop this pebble, and if you don't guess where it stops, I take your stuff."

The New Philosophy Sitcom: Sartre Trek, Boldly Going Nowhere.

How to win the Lottery. - Scratch 'n' read edition.

"I know I've asked this before, but are you sure it's 'paper cuts scissors'?"