Video Conference Juggler Gifts

"Whose idea was it to create a Zoom session for first graders?"

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

'Lion Tamer experience hey? Well, I have a project currently needing your management skills...'

"I'm too busy to be stressed."

"I think I'll have the businessman's lunch."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"....how many kids have we got now?"

'A few messages came in during your lunch break.'

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

Heloise's Helpful Hints for Homebound

"You seem to be balancing your workload well."

Overworked

"All this stuff? I'm meeting for two now."

'He's still able to do the work of three committees.'

"Hello?"

The Communicator

'I don't like your attitude, Peterson, whatever it is.'

Look at me multitasking. I'm shooting the breeze, checking invoices and drinking coffee.

My new boss is a real multitaskmaster!

'You're three o'clock cancelled, the Parson deal is ending, and your husband wants to know if the dishes are dirty or clean.'

"I was just ringing to see if you got the e-mail about the letter I sent you?"

'Jack, I'm on a conference call right now.'

"He's in a high stake poker game right now."

"One of my strengths as an employee is my ability to multitask."

Future Micro MGR.

'I hate to see you work during your lunch hour, so do me a favor and close your door.'

"We'll have to pick this up later. My plane just went down, sharks ate my personal assistant, and apparently I'm winning some kind of surfing competition."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

'Call me back - the old trout's on the other line.'

"Yes dear, I know excessive mobile use is dangerous, that's not why I'm calling."

... and I'd suggest you take more frequent breaks from your computer.