Vices Gifts

Smoking in the Paradise.

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Scarpia from Tosca

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Sauce for the Goose

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

'If anybody here knows why these two should not be wed...'

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

'During the break, my client stole my wallet.'

The evidence destroyed

'Sure, we pay them for protection but there are unexpected bonuses: nobody can tenderise veel like Luigi or slice beef as fine as Vinny.'

Mobsters at the Beach

'Mark Antony addreses the mob'

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

'Don't step on that in your bare feet - my mom does and screams.'

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

Phone Hacking Explained - 50 p.

911: Would You Like Us To Commit a Crime?

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

'Apparently my DNA had guilt written all over it.'