Vice Quitter Gifts

"Phil suddenly decided to give up everything that was bad for him-no more smoking, drinking, or junk food-and he feels absolutely terrific!"

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

"Its my letter of resignation. I also turned it into a memoir."

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

"I want to quit, spend more time with my family, finish grade 3....."

'There's something about being locked up with a 500lb gorilla, highly allergic to cigarette smoke, that works every time.'

"My chronic condition has been pestering me every single day for the past six months. I'm a lifelong quitter so its persistence is troubling me."

"Can we get some more nicotine patches, pal?"

'It's a side effect of giving up smoking.'

"I see you went to the hypnotherapist"

'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'

'To show I'm serious about giving up smoking for new year, I'm going to sign this pledge.'

"There's nothing wrong with my eye. It's a nicotine patch."

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

'After you stop smoking you're supposed to eat more, not drink more.'

I'm giving you a prescription for hard-to-remove stop smoking patches. Place one over the opening of every pack of cigarettes you buy.

Smokers.

'Oh man, I should really give up smoking!'

'Are you still frustrated with the computer, dear?'

'Do the patches help?'

'Sorry, you can't smoke in the control group.'

'I gave up smoking.'

'I quit smoking weeks ago but Bruno didn't want to go along with the program.'

Man carring plans

Captain Hook tries the cigarette patch.

"Quit smoking and stay out of the sun."

Office worker phoning Stop smoking help line

"The nicotine patches have been great Dr, he hasn't been able to find the cigarettes since Thursday."

Man emphasizing that he has quit (colour)

"Mr. Brown, my ship came in. I've decided to cruise right on out of here!"

'I'm down to five a day with this new brand!'

'You smoke, we'll do the rest! Okay?'

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

Stop Smoking Programe.