Veggie Guardians Gifts

"I hate guarding potatoes with all those eyes staring at me!"

The Jeopardy of Progress

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

Bumble Bee

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

Biodiversity

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

"Relax. They're just crows."

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

"I can’t come to bed yet. I have bulbs to plant."

“Children hate me.”

"Don't try the candied yams and sweet peas, turns out they are vegetables."

'You're right, Mom. Carrots did give me good eyesight. Now I can spot vegetables I don't like a mile away.'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

Forest Management

'Success! I've just hacked into a supposedly squirrel-proof birdfeeder!'

"Look, they get really mad when I dig up the garden, so, can you please sign this statutory declaration..."

I think we need stronger slug pellets for the garden!

Dog excited watching a new tree being planted