Vegetable Pundit Pillows

"But for an update in GM products in farming we have a spokescarrot."

Allotment

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"Steamed vegetables."

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

Our farmer brought fresh beans, tomatoes, corn and squash this week. Nice. You should have bought into the farm share. I've got my own farmer. Mine's cheap. Mine's cheaper. Thanks, mom. You can't take more zucchini?

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

Frank & Ernie's Carrot, Beet, Potato Farm. Lunch break's over --- Shall we return to our roots?

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

Vegetarian Birthdays.

Onion Tears

"Mummy said dinner was brussels sprouts tonight. What about we drop by the park and see if the old man sitting on the bench can feed us instead?"

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

Rap-scallions

Pea

Avocado Timeline

'Needs more kale.'

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"I have to be honest: the job you're applying for is a real no-brainer. Are you sure you're OK with that?"

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

'Not here, Fred.'

"Summer's here. Do you want to start talking incessantly about tomatoes or corn?"

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

Apples...37 Spinach...43 Peaches...51

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'