Vegetable Humor Gifts

'My yellow rabbits, I bring you... DRESSING!'

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"I have to be honest: the job you're applying for is a real no-brainer. Are you sure you're OK with that?"

A sheep ordering in a restaurant - the sole item on the menu is grass.

"Which one on table three has gone for the vegetarian option?"

Two vegetarians please.

"Hey, this is just a bun!" "Help yourself to the mustard."

Free salad bar.

At home with the leeches: 'No, you can't have a Quorn tartlet - just drink your blood and be quiet!'

Broccoli reading: 'Coping with Anthropomorphism'.

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

Spinach Dating.

'... And I now insert the brai ... Egor, this is a cauliflower.'

Rob and Maria dated for months, until the day he realized she was made entirely out of soy.

"Y'know what? - sod it. . . I think I'll have the grass too. . .!"

"I'm leaning towards the health benefits of becoming a vegetarian."

"I eat green but I don't vote green."

"Y a qué de la salade?"

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

'We're vegetarians now because the prey animals have formed a union.'

'What do you mean you're a vegetarian?'

Midnight in the Vegetable Garden of Good and Evil.

'And I can do the procedure right here in my office.'

Tofu bi-products.

'I don't think I've ever had an eggplant before!'

An Artichoke choking on some food