Vegan Vampire Hunter Gifts

Ghost Train for vegans...

"States of tofu"

He looks so natural lying there...

"Getting drunk grilling lettuce just isn't the same."

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'Health Benefits of a Vegan Diet... How the heck did this get here?'

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"I told the cook I would prefer that she use some kind of artificial blackbird substitute."

"Race you to the corner! Last one there is an expired egg substitute!"

I grew up vegetarian. Wow. That takes work to stay strong. What motivates you? Hey, lettuce brain! Peer pressure.

'And since this product consists of 100% artificial ingredients, we can truthfully say it's vegan!'

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense.'

Dale regretted going to the Vegan restaurant.

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Finally - Prof. Brozinski found the vegetarian vampire! And he knew what to do...

'... Got anything besides apples?'

"... And that's an 18-pound piece of tofu I shot at Whole Foods."

"Apparently, giving up wearing fur wasn't enough!"

"I am still vegan, I am just having a cheat day."

"I'm thinking of switching to an all vegan diet...based on carrots...mainly carrots..."

I guess I outta take science classes if I'm really going to help the environment. What for? You want to be a famous actress

'The only vegan item on the menu is the menu itself.'

"There are no animal products in our dishes, but since the meals are prepared by animals, you may find some stray hairs."

'I'll try the 'Hippy meal'.'

"Were you genuinely interested in where I get my protein, or was it the introductory question to a long and pointless attack on my personal dietary choices?"

'That IS the chef's surprise, sir -- the pork chops are really tofu.'

Van Helsing's plans are thwarted by the Count's new anti-staking device.

"What've you got that's good for vegans?"

'Hey, a fly! This is supposed to be vegetarian soup.'

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense."

"Can we be seated under a vegan painting?"

The Last Dinner