Vegan Merry-makers Gifts

"Santa, sorry for the soy milk and vegan fig bars - Caleb."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

"Gesundheit!"

'I'd like to tell you all about it, dear, but what happens in Joe's Bar STAYS in Joe's Bar.'

"We all go a bit crackers over Christmas, just try to pull yourself together."

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Working at a brewery.

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

'One thing about beer -- you never get buyer's remorse.'

Hey, it's 5am somewhere, am I right?

Please visit www.frtn_cookie.com.

Prosecco and Pudding

Drunk Golfer.

'Yeah... and I'm the tooth-fairy!'

'The Easter Bunny and Hist Eight Tiny Reinhares.'

Bourbon Street signs: Party and Sober Up.

Cow sneezes milk at breakfast.

Nutcracker

Cats pull a Christmas cracker and find a mouse inside.

"Don't worry dear. I won't spoil her anymore than you can afford."

"This batch of Witch's Brew is vegan. The eye of newt and toe of frog are plant-based."

It's our editorial opinion that you DESERVE a very Merry Christmas.

'Uh ho. I wouldn't venture outside on the 24th December if I were you.'

The Rake's Progress - Tavern Scene.

Man leaving the tavern and realising he is late for dinner

'If the Lord knows each time a sparrow falls to earth, it seems like a Minister of the Gospel could at least remember to mail a few Christmas cards.'

"Naughty or nice? I thought in a post-fact world, anything goes?"

"Danny told us you don't eat meat, so we made you a fisherman instead."

Merry and Bright!

"What were those songs you were singing?"

"Yeah of course I told them I was bringing you, why?"