Vegan Meal Planner Pillows

"I thought I was safe planning a vegan staff Christmas dinner."

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Like death by salad.'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

'Men order. . . women shop.'

Kiddies Menu for Witches

"Ok, ok, we'll travel back to dinnertime one more time, but then it's my turn to choose."

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

"That's the door to the gym, past all the snack machines."

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

'Before you order, perhaps you'd like to discuss your food issues with our eating therapist.'

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

A day at the FULL CIRCLE RANCH

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

'I put an app on your computer to remove cookies and other thins slowing it down. It's like fiber for your computer.'

"No arguing mister! I want you to eat at least one pea!"

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

"Your dinner is at www.Icouldntbearsed.com."

"Our specials can also be accessed at www.todaysspecials.com."

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'

'How many Breadsticks have you eaten?'

"Hey, guess what we're having for dinner tomorrow."

"How much would it cost if I don't take classes but just live in a dorm with a meal plan?"

'Of course, if your father was any kind of provider, we'd be eating fresh salmon for breakfast!'

'His snacks and his meals are beginning to OVERLAP!'

"But we had stir-fry last night and the night before."

"I'm in the mood for meat."