Vanity Appreciator Pillows

"What can I tell you.. Maybe she has a beter surgeon than you.."

'I turn the other cheek more now that Botox has made it wrinkle-free.'

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"

"Mr. Robson, you don't need to use your mirror so frequently."

TV-Mirror.

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

'Yes, you look stunning. Can I put the mirror down now?'

'I'm 43, but I'm having it changed to 38 by deed poll.'

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'Psst! It's the invisible man. Try not to stare at his new hair piece.'

Love - It's all in how you look at it.

"I never thought about coloring my hair until I coughed up a gray hair ball."

Hot chilli...

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest senior citizen of them all?"

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"Hair spray"

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

'Mommy puts on a disguise every time, before she goes to work.'

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

Vanity artist

Krest Yellow Strips. (Rat performs dental hygiene.)

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

'If you ain't broke, I'll fix it.'