Vampire Aficionado Pillows

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

'No wonder I've had an identity crisis...I've never seen my own reflection...I just naturally assumed I was the invisible man.'

Vampire brushing his teeth in his bathroom.

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

'I can only teach night classes.'

Wolfman riding in the Car

'As a matter of fact I am an artist, but I only draw blood'

From the moment his blind date showed up, the Count knew it wasn't going to work out.

'This is a stick up!'

'Since I started drinking AB Positive blood, I feel a lot better about myself!'

Unfortunately Dracula had forgotten all about daylight saving time.

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

'A vampire bat! No kidding!'

Vampire practical jokes.

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

DUBUFFET THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

Vampire with a violin

'I'll make a good lawyer. I know how to go for the jugular.'

"Wait! First, his attorney."

Mom says to put some moonblock on my back.

'Aah...a new duvet.'

Halloween Vampire

'Bummer. Apparently I'm not a vampire.'

"Another bill?"

Who says Romance is dead?

Does this contain garlic?

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

'Yeah? Well... bite me! No... wait!'

Happy Hallowe'en!

vampire sees bottles of whole milk and whole blood on doorstep.

Dracula gets bitten by a mosquito

Transylvania Weather Channel. Your Host: Igor. Great vampire weather as the sun sets early! As an added bonus, the moon will be full for all you werewolves... Patches of fog will make it delightful for scaring victims .....

Bloody Mary … Hold the Mary.

“This particular variety was incredibly full-bodied.”

"Listen, I'm not going to keep letting you in and out all day."