Valuations Expert Gifts

"Well, it would have been worth half a million pounds..."

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

"It's time for your performance review where I damn you with faint praise."

Does your accountant share your enthusiasm for the future...We're fantastically excited about the new project!

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

"You question my methodology? Perhaps you should question your questionology."

A safe is about to fall on an unsuspecting man interested in risk-free investments.

"According to the most recent report, we have no recourse but to abandon ship."

Gas Prices

'...but then the Dow rallied and the blue chips began to rise...'

Valuation of Heaven

Let the profit-making begin!

“What we have here is an old moral compass. How did it come into your possession?”

'Simmons is our expert in oil stocks.'

"With skyrocketing condo prices these days I can easily get $2.5 million."

For Sale, just to find the true value.

Gobbledygookologist

'He's reacting to a consumer shift that only he can hear.'

"Has it been in your family long?"

Money Laundering

Parking validation

A bomb appears in the shadow of the Statue of Liberty.

'I reviewed the figures. The consultant saved us a bundle but cost us a larger bundle.'

"Also, that random comment you made three years ago will count against you."

'So what's so great about being an economist? You can talk about money without having to make any.'

Flat tax

"Bobby was caught imposing his values on another student."

Help. If I hadn't lost everything, I'll tell you what stocks I'd buy now.

"Snipes is our in-house Chicken Little, and he says the sky is falling."

And now, by rule, mommy get to read you a story with an opposing moral.

Expert and Ex-Pert

Tax Dodgem Cars.

Alexis Tsipras and the EU.

Ideology Test

'Felton,has it occured to you that you may have taken a talent for self-effacement a bit too far?'