Valentine's Day Prankster Gifts

A special gift for Valentine...'A Canadian massage...wonder what that is...'

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

"I said I'd give you the world, didn't I?"

"This will be hilarious!"

Scary stuff

"No, Doris, not implants!"

Diving Cat.

'I could eat you.'

Mother hen driving with 'Eggs on Board' sign.

'They were all out of roses.'

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"Do you have a Venus Fly Trap?"

Man proposes using strong flour as a ring.

Snowman throws snowball at Santa.

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

"The stranger came bearing gifts of graham crackers and chocolate. No one suspected the murder weapon he hid behind his back until..."

Book signing The Art Of Forgery - "Gee thanks, Oprah Winfrey."

I thought we'd get fake tattoos of each other's names. If we're still together in 10 years, we'll get real ones.'

'I need an officer to respond to a report of a stolen donut truck.'

I'm sending myself three Valentine's cards...that should keep my hubby on his toes!

Whaaaah!(Scarey ghost shaped fart).

After exhaustive auditions, Rudy Park hires a new writer. You should've seen the brawl that broke out between Rowling, Twain and Watterson. They all really wanted the gig … until they heard what it pays. So who'd we hire? Darrin Bell. The guy who draws us. That clown? Shhh!! What? I'm not afraid of him. To be continued …

When comedians propose marriage.

"Our violinist isn't here tonight, but Tony here will be happy to play something romantic on his cymbals for you."

Write "Brenda' but use disappearing ink

'Honey, this is Alonzo

"Where's that damn 'escape' key?"

'Trick or treatment.'

Man is walking his dachshund with a Happy Valentines Day balloon tied around dog's belly lifting it off of the sidewalk.

Snowman in the Freezer.

'...Psst...heel...heel Ben, psst...'

'If my husband comes home, duck out that door. . . He'll never see you.'

4 pm MEET THE COPYCAT AUTHOR

Witch's Smile.