Vacation Strategist T-Shirts

'I'm not turning you out. It's just that I'm taking my vacation, as cat naps in half hour increments, over several months.'

The World Will End... After Labor Day

'The perfect week for my vacation. Enough work to insure I'll be missed, but not so much that I'll be overwhelmed in my post-vacation funk.'

"I schedule all my vacations around work. When the going gets tough, I get going."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

"I said I wanted to visit the Brandenburg Gate."

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

Airlines

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"I've just barbecued my head again."

"I am not a workaholic. I just work to relax."

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

Heading off with a packed bag

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

A holiday at home

"Life after death"

Travelogue

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

School holidays

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"You know, no matter how much you stare at your watch, summer isn't going to come any faster."

Evolution Of The Jet Ski

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

Memorable Travel Adventure: 'I was in Florida, and on a whim, decided to wrestle an alligator.'

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

"I'd like one of your bucket and spade holidays."

'Looks like this part of the beach has been claimed.'

"Let's go on vacation, get disappointed, complain about prices, read terrible novels, buy trashy souvenirs, miss the dog and look forward to coming home."

"I downloaded a new app that puts me on a tropical island no matter where I'm at."