Vacation Expert T-Shirts

'The hermetically-sealed pods in the back seat are perfect for long family vacations.'

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

Bad fake tan day.

Fight or Flight

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

I took a vacation to forget everything and I forgot my luggage.

Sunbathers.

'I keep very close touch with the office in case things are running too smoothly without me.'

'we must be near the water because I see a sea gull.'

'Have a nice weekend, Alfred.'

Beach hats

"Honsetly Fred, we just got here and you want to go home."

"I only need shade for my wine."

I've given you 110 for ten years, like you asked. Now I'm taking that year off that I've earned!

Taking Cupid on a holiday.

A holiday at home

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"Well Earned Vacation"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

Holiday Aerobics.

'Now that hunting season is over, I'd suggest separate vacations.'

"Noooooooooooo!"

"If we'd gone South for the winter, we'd be back by now."

'Think, Billy - where did you bury Dad?'

"How's it look back there?"

Vacation Bus Photo

Call Your Office

How the goat got square eyes.

"This is perfect. I could stay like this for the next five seconds."

Couch and Potato

'We must have everything... this is all that's left!'