Urbanite Friend Gifts

"I wish there was a way to get out of the city this summer without leaving Manhattan."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

Mr Metrosexual.

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

"What's wrong, girl? Trouble? Rachel can't decide which private school to attend?" "Upper West Side Lassie"

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

75 Years: The Commemorative Issues

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"And before leaving virtual class today be sure and hit that like button!"

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

Nativity Scene on the Underground

Conan the Barbarian's brother- Charles the Civilized.

'You can't use the elevator as guestroom!'

"The end of my patience is near!"

"The country might not suit a city boy like you. We've got coyotes instead of doormen and feelings have no meaning here."

"Maybe what's good for Wall Street isn't good for Main Street, but it's great for Tribeca."

Persons of Faith

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"Everybody seems to be in such a hurry these days!"

I'm hungry...I'm homeless...I'm dead.

"Hold on, I'm not a Hatfield or a McCoy—I'm from Brooklyn."

"Pleased to meet you neighbour! I'm the first wave of gentrification."

Third-Floor Rapunzel

"So we're on top of the Empire State Building and the kid says, 'Relax. Everyone knows cats always land on their feet.' So then..."

'Can we have a starter for ten, please?'

Urban therapy.

Progress.

'I'm mixing drinks. Would you like a womanhattan with me?'

Flying duck planes on wall of house near airport.

"I'd delete Facebook—But I really enjoy roasting landlords and their overpriced rentals."

'It's Darwin's only chance to practice when he's in the city.'