Urban Jungle Dwellers Gifts

"…Ok, tough guy, see this scar? Prius hit me—didn’t even hear it coming." "I got that beat. Right here: three-year-old woke me from a nap with a fork."

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"See? And you said you couldn't work from home."

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Wifi in Hell

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

"Did you remember to take the trash in?"

No Immediate Danger

"Did I show you my new climbing hydrangea plants, Mr. Fessler?... Mr. Fessler?"

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

Packed like sardines

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

Is Driving Doomed?

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"National Metaphor Day by the looks of it."

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

"Right now it's between you and two hundred and fifty other people who came to Seattle, moved in with five roommates, joined a band, took a job in a coffee bar, got fed up, had a meeting with themselves, and decided it was time to go out and find a real job."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

"The dangers of texting while walking #17"