Unorthodox Pet Owner Pillows

"He was a sea rescue."

Seagiraffes

'Fetch.'

Biofelineism

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'You're doing that just to bug me, aren't you?'

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

Roget's Pet

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

"Now I'm sure that, at this point, you're wondering HOW I can remove the anal sacs..."

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

he used to belong to a cartoonist

"We have to stop meeting like this – people are starting to talk ‘psychiatric ward.’"

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

'If you don't notice an improvement after a few weeks, we can try a different cone.'

"That was the pet store, dear - they want to know if you've noticed any minor flashes of aggression in Joey since starting the steroid bird feed?"

'And this is scraps.'

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

Al's Teachers' Pets.