Uniform Disruptor Pillows

"You must be the new guy!"

"Here's what you wanted – a strategy to live abundantly, build capital, surpass your peers and disappoint your heirs."

"Move, Gary."

'before you say 'all this will be yours', I don't want it.'

'We've got trouble, Henderson - Your people got with my people and decided they didn't need us.'

GAP. GAP. NO GAP.

"...but before we begin our slide presentation on accounts receivable...this is how I make a bunny!"

'She wishes.'

What If?

"Pawn to King Four."

"I've decided to give up my day to day responsibilities."

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz - 'How did my life get this dull?'

Spoonfest

"I consider myself to be a counterproductive member of society."

'They tried to GAG her but they can NEVER stop her 'dance of neglect on the ward'!'

A man exits his house to a clapboard.

'I didn't know I was going to sneeze.'

"Do you think one of you geniuses could come up with a comfortable bar stool?"

"I left my boring dividends to fool around with capital appreciation."

Occupy crunch

Master dog trainer.

A dictator makes a speech, about to be doused with water.

'Miss Jones, those pants have got to go. I can't have my secretary looking like a boy.'

"That's the first time he's ever done anything spontaneous!"

An angry engineer getting out of a train that has had to stop because a woman has taken some railroad ties out to build a flower garden in the middle of the tracks.

Isn't It Exciting?

TV Kill

'We'd like to share a haircut.'

'Would you mind jumping in further down please?'

do you like democrats of republicans? is that the only choice?