
'This is Bob. He's really short, but he's got quick hands, watch.'
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'This is Bob. He's really short, but he's got quick hands, watch.'
"I never dreamed we'd migrate."
"You weren't expecting a walrus, right?"
Giraffe Portrait
"What a load of hocus-pocus!"
"And do you have any OTHER skills you can bring to the post apart from being able to burp the Beatles greatest hits?"
"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."
"Hire him. You can't teach shadows like that."
"Schedule the 'voyeur' and the 'exhibitionist' for the same time. I want them to meet."
Will You Marry Me Marcy 'Tough break, Marcy.'
"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."
"She doesn’t fetch or roll over or anything really, but she’s a terrific whistler."
"We started with fetch and heel, but we've moved on to impasto and chiaroscuro."
'All I've ever wanted to do is dance!'
'Sit!'
"I don't get you. You can soft shoe, play the ukulele and juggle, but you can't fetch a pair of slippers."
'My mum can play the piano by ear.'
"I didn’t know you could play."
"And I was all like - severed head in a sack? What severed head in a sack?"
Artist throws paint at a canvas and is amazed to find that the result is the "Whistler's Mother" painting.
Simon Cowell
'He's not too fast on his feet, but he's got a hell of a right hook!'
The Crew played Musical Selections from 'Luciano Pavarotti sings Snoop Dog."
"What are you doing?!"
"Wow, Tia Carmen...that's amazing! How do you do it?"
'Uri Geller's First Job.' 'That's the 20th spoon you've bent today.'
"I can't believe how COMPETITIVE the job market has gotten. The company I interviewed at today already has 16 employees who can burp the ABCs!"
"What other qualifications do you have besides mastering the art of playing 'We Have No Bananas' with your armpit?"
"Excuse me, sir. Our phones are down, so I'm here with your wake-up call."
An unexpected development during round three of the annual nuclear physics play-off.
He's got a lousy voice!
"It says here there's a pug in Peoria that can play the harmonica."
"He's one in a million."
'He doesn't do the sounds, he does the smells.'
Burglar opens safe of the ACME MAGIC SHOP, finds it empty, slams door, opens it again and finds the safe full of money.
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