Unexpected Humor Lover Gifts

'Not that sort of pool party.'

Desert crawler sees 'No Crawling' sign.

'Let's do something in bad taste.'

'Now that's something you don't see every day!'

Aa falconer looses his arm to his peregrine falcon.

'Philosophize!'

Faster, Georges, faster!

"Look! No hands!"

Apple Pie Abduction

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Gardening Calendar: January - The Snow will be deep now...get out into the garden...

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

The Hammer

"You are still here."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

Public footpath on a desert island.

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

"I guess one of the bunnies was a boy after all!"

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Where Are They Now?'

'You're a good man, Henderson, but you don't have your staff's respect.'

"I'll have dessert first."

Infection Control Center. Now Hiring. I should have said "I'm not afraid of hard work" rather than "I don't mind getting my hands dirty."

Help! Send fishing tackle!

"Fit the reality to our statistics!"

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

Healthy Eating Casualties

Beware of sissified, but tough dog!

"I just remembered where I left my chew toy."

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."