Unexpected Expense Strategist Gifts

'You owe us five more dollars.'

Cardiac Recovery.

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"Expense account or regular?"

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'I gotta bad feeling about this.'

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

'A belt will have to be tightened...not the cars...yours.'

"I see your point, but wouldn't it be more fun to spend it while I'm young enough to enjoy it?"

"It's wonderful, Harry! How late does Neiman-Marcus stay open?"

'When it comes to shopping, not only does the buck stop here, but so do the fives, tens, twenties, fifties and hundreds.'

'Before you begin, I'd like to thank you for coming in early to do this on such short notice.'

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

"He's not our founder. He just found us the most tax loopholes."

'What happens when we run out of gas?!'

"Boss, I have a suggestion for you that's win-win. It'll save you thousands of dollars in health insurance premiums... If you pay to have me cryogenically frozen and then thawed every other day, I'll get to live to be 180, and you'll get an employee who's young and productive for the rest of your life."

"I need nothing and I want everything."

'We just drive by and throw candy and stuff like in a parade.'

Cardiac Recovery Unit (surprise party waiting around corner.)

'What wine goes with an enormous expense account?'

'I simply can't live on what I earn. I can't even live on what I spend.'

"We need to be extra careful about expenditure...and I thought we could save a but by having the Xmas, New Year and redundancy parties at the same time!"

"We're going to spend £5M to put over the message that our product is so good it sells itself!"

'Budget cuts have forced NASA to find alternative training methods.'

Free long distance

'Good heavens, Margaret, the bailout was for wall street, not for you.'

'It's similar to the government's system of checks and balances. I write the checks and you try to balance them.'

"No matter what one says, a safe remains a good way to keep your money safe."

"My wife disposes all of my disposable income."

"It was the cheapest way for us to cover the potholes."