Underground Bunker Explorer T-Shirts

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

Thinks he's too cool for school.

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

"You two seem oddly suited."

"Seriously, you looked so perfect that at first, I thought you were a lure..."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

Naked Mole Rat

"Aww geez... peanut butter and jellyfish again."

"That, believe it or not, is also a mammal."

The Great Drywall of Sheboygan.

Going Down?

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

God in the bunker.

Scuba diver in a fishmongers

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

The different taste regions on a blue whale's tongue.

Jacques Cousteau.

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

"I'll have a man overboard!"

Professional to fish about mounted fish: 'This is what happens if you let yourself get hooked on worms.'

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

'The problem is you're a perfectionist. You don't always have to be totally evil. Sometimes it's OK to just be annoying.'

'They played 'Digging' the whole afternoon: They had lots of fun !'

"Let us be a city under a hill, for all the world not to see."

'This is terrible. If the plankton go out on strike, it'll disrupt the entire food chain.'

Deep Sea Diver Serenades a Mermaid.

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"When I say I'm rich I don't just mean in Omega 3 oils."

'I'm bored with the Sisyphus channel. Switch to the Tantalus channel.'

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)