Ufoologist Gifts

The conspiracy behind conspiracy theories.

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

Hair Crop Circle

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

"Take me to your mechanic."

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

Alien Assumption

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"Don't be sad, Bud. These decisions are so political."

'Gravity...Go figure!'

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

dog vs UFO...

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

New Road Signs to Watch For:

Watch the skies: UFO buffs all stare at the sky, yet alien is amongst them.

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

How life on Earth really got its start.

Elevator Music

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

How Glaciations Begin

'I think it's safe to say that there used to be life here on the moon, but that it's now extinct.'

Michael Jackson - Mission fulfilled.

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

"Greetings, Earthling. How are the schools?"

"I've always wondered, do light years have half the calories of regular years?"

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

"Move along please. There's nothing to see here!"

'Six years ago you received a complimentary set of steak knives. You thought they were free didn't you Jimmy?...'

'The smart phone is amazing you can contact anybody in the world.'