Ufo Giggler Gifts

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

'I'm sorry for laughing Emperor Dorkbutt, it's just that in our language, well...'

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'If Batman can have a batmobile why can't a snowman...'

Black Hole Corks

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

'Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?'

Ghosts save on electrical & plumbing maintenance costs because they don't need easy access to the inside of walls.

Astronaut with his Space Dog.

The Big A** Theory

'Finally some good news about out new vitamin pill!'

"After analyzing the energy waves emitted by this pulsar near Andromeda, I believe we have an answer to the age old question: 'Where do jokes come from?'"

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

'AAAAH! UDDER LEECH!'

"Joe, you've got to stop singing 'Rocket Man.' Okay, how about 'Ground control to Major Tom'?"

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'First of all, Eddie, most people don't usually lose theah boats...'

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"