Twin Tales Gifts

'I had a very lonely childhood. I was an only twin.'

Conjoined twins at the supermarket

The Fourth Little Pig

"It get it – you're hungry."

A Fairytale Update

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

"When are you going to stop blaming everything on Goldilocks?"

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

'It's a common misconception, but it's always been three fishes.'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

Midnight Basketball

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

"I was hoping you'd consider this a prelude to a kiss."

'Wait a second, Dad...did the three little pigs have a home owner's policy to cover huffing and puffing?'

'...And another thing, I am not your best friend, thats just an old wives' tale.'

"Mum, Dad... I'd like you to meet my fiance, Goldilocks."

'He followed me home...Can I kiss him?'

'...Oh yeah? Well I've never heard of the 'denture fairy'.'

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

Witch takes off on a runway surrounded by planes.

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'