Twilight Golfer Gifts

"Please take a seat and wait! The dentist is very busy today. He has almost done eighteenth holes!"

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'You're about to see a drive for the ages!'

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'He lived and died for golf.'

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

His golfing career in a long tailspin, PGA pro Andy Pemrick spent his later years as the pro at Happy Time Mini-Putt.

"Swallow the ball and stick the club up your a**e."

Will sneak through the woods and throw your ball back into the fairway.

'Putter'.

Alien hits golf balls off space ship into the moon's craters.

'Hmmm...I think I've figured out why you're slicing...'

Smooching on the Golf Course.

'Do you mind if I play through?'

"IV!"

Women Golfers

A superhero rides an invisible golf cart.

Using Science In Fashion Design

Golfing Romance

'It wouldn't be so bad to play golf in winter if the balls were just another color.'

'Every Sunday I thank God that I'm an atheist!'

Golfer putting into whale's blowhole.

'You made that divot deliberately.'

The last run of the day.

At first he thought he had died and gone to heaven.

The 19th hole

"Slicey, Trappy, Bogey, Toppy, Mulligan, Hooky, Threeputty

"This putt is worth $75,000 - certainly more than enough for a decent suit of clothes, a haircut and a set of real golf clubs!"

How to tell you're playing a low budget golf course.

'So, come here often?'

Observing a hydnoraceae on the 14th, Professor Brinley sportingly pitched rather than putted.

Drawing of ancient golfer

"No, not yet."